Thursday, March 09, 2006

Ode-banned!


hello Bury fans!

i have just heard that I am now not allowed to tell people about my life on the official Bury FC message board as my topics of conversation (all true stories may I add) have proved too controversial.

to begin with, i thought this row was about my emission of Nigerian markets in the section about my home country and I was ready to apologise (again) for this. Nigeria has some wonderful markets which burst with energy, fill the air with wonderful scents and will always greet you with a smile even though you may lose yours when you return to the car park and realise that you won’t be able to drive home on the bricks that you discover there.

then, to my horror I discover that they have, as far as I have understood this discussion, banned me for being the first black poster on their message board!

this is disgusting and now many folk back home will continue to suffer as some people continue to bury their heads in the sand to the problems my people have to deal with. it now seems that I will never have the opportunity to become the first Nigerian to set foot on the turf at Gigg Lane.

i feel deeply saddened by this but thank people (who are now my friends) for their wonderful comments and support via my website and the Y3K website. i don’t have much that I can offer in return (my sister is already married), but I shall continue posting about my love of Bury FC and my enjoyment of this country, which on the whole doesn’t reflect the racism now seemingly associated with the moderators of the official message board.

my mother used to warn that if you couldn’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. she thought Ajayi from the next village must have been a real nasty piece of work until a few years ago she discovered that he’d been born mute. my grandmother misheard her and thought he’d been born with some sort of tail and lived in a swamp. life was crazy for a while.

in general, it has been a bad week for me as a few nights ago I returned to my student accommodation to find that somebody had stolen my Terry Venables model, my atlas and numerous other valuable items. the most distressing thing of all was the fact that somebody had stolen some letters from my grandfather and my list of favourite Bury players surnames. my favourite is Anyinsah.

this is not the first time that I’ve experienced crime since moving to England from Nigeria. one of the dodgier guys on my course was arrested in Toys ‘R’ Us when the security staff caught him with a Woody down his pants. he claimed that he had all the other Toy Story characters but couldn’t afford to buy this one.

i was stunned to hear that we had Casper in net at Shrewsbury. perhaps that after his career ending injury, he was trained to just stand in the area and deal with crosses.

a similar thing happened to a young lad called Amadi when I was at school back home (Nigeria). his family was quite rich as his dad worked on an oil rig and he had Sky TV at home. we used to go round to his house to watch WWF wrestling. after it had finished we’d go and play football and if he didn’t go in net we’d whip the back of his legs with nettles, cover him with honey and throw him to the bees. Amadi moved to England soon after, threatening that he’d get his own back one day. i think he joined the army a few years ago.

good luck Bury fans!

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